The answer is always LOVE (or sometimes, "42"!)

The answer is always LOVE (or sometimes, "42"!)
My philosophy is LOVEISM...

Sunday, November 30, 2014

My Walmart “Black Friday” Experience

"Black Friday" at a Walmart

When my uncle asked me if I wanted to join him in going to WALMART on Thanksgiving evening, for a pre-Black Friday “event”, every cell in my body screamed, “Are you fucking KIDDING me?!”  My strong response to this innocent request for company immediately showed me how many “stories” I had about Walmart as a company, “gross consumerism”, the people who shop and work at Walmart, the products sold at Walmart –in other words, all HARSH JUDGMENTS based on, let’s be honest—the media (*even if it is independent media) and very few personal experiences at Walmart (I boycotted Walmart for almost a decade, so I have probably only been there about 5 times in my life.) Therefore, I recognized THIS as a n OPPORTUNITY to really get out of my comfort zone, test my zen skills and PRACTICE all my beliefs about ONENESS.  So I went.

Yes, the Walmart parking lot was FULL at about 5:30 pm Thanksgiving evening, but it was rather quiet under the snowflakes, like any other day.  Much to my surprise, there were no lines or mobs of poorly-dressed obese people, as often portrayed in the media. We sauntered peacefully into the store.  People were casually hovering over large bins of items throughout the store-- everything from crock pots to electronics to toys, etc.  We were instructed that we were not to “touch” any of the merchandise until exactly 6 PM and then it was a “free for all!” Despite all the Walmart “Event” Staff, I could see how this could get insane very quickly. 

Prepared, my uncle Tim had a list of items he wanted to get for himself and his wife. Our “strategy” was to locate the items first; delegate who was getting which items; and then at 6 pm, “grab our items” and get the fuck out of there as quickly as possible (and then go celebrate with a cocktail at a local bar!)  Therefore, I found myself standing among a small crowd, of mostly women, hovering around a Fruit of a Loom Sweatshirts bin (*because my uncle wanted 4 X-L sweatshirts for $4 each).  Meanwhile, my uncle Tim was just around the corner, standing around a bin of other clothes he wanted to buy for his wife.  

“I have never done this before, I mean, how does this work exactly?” I asked the women around me. 

The woman singing to herself (“You Can Ring My Bell”) next to me chirped: “Well, at 6 pm, we just go for what we want and hope we to get it!” 

Me:  “Well, what are YOU going for?” 

Singing woman:  “Oh, I want a medium orange sweatshirt, a black one and a grey one too.”

I then pointed to the woman directly across the bin from me, who happened to be standing above the orange sweatshirts, “And what are YOU going for?”

She chirped, “I want a large black sweatshirt, an orange one and matching sweat pants.” Gradually, person by person, in a circle, people shared exactly what they wanted.

ME, pointing to the woman directly across from me, “Well, how about I get you your large green sweatshirt, since I am standing right in front of them-- and YOU get me an extra-large black sweat shirt, since you are standing in front of them?” She smiled a YES, and everyONE got it immediately. 

Therefore, at the stroke of 6 pm, WE as a group of “Black Friday” shoppers hovering over a Fruit of a Loom sweatshirt bin, agreed to help ONE another get what each ONE of us wanted, not only in a friendly, peaceful way, but it was also extremely time efficient—Tim and I were OUT of WALMART within in 10 Minutes!  We timed it!  Because we accomplished our goals so quickly, we did not even have to wait in line at the cashier—and note:  the cashier happened to be very cute! And having to park at the very end of the parking lot turned out to be a BLESSING, as we were able to make a swift exit and headed straight to a local bar to celebrate!
Cheers!  with my Uncle Tim!

LIVE your Bliss,
Kelly N Patterson (aka, the Goofy Guru)

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Under the Sun Art and Music Festival (Miami) is seeking artists, merchants and musicians

Presented by Frames USA & Art Gallery, the Under the Sun Art & Music Festival is sponsored in part by Frames USA & Art Gallery, with support from Miami Dade County Parks. On this inaugural year, the event's goal is to feature more than 300 local and non-local ARTISTS and MERCHANTS exhibiting work in a range of mediums. MUSIC from local talent will also be presented on two stages.

*Artist, photographer and craft booth spaces cost only $59 for the one-day event.

“We would like to extend an invitation to participate in the newest art and music festival to hit the Miami Events Calendar.  We would like to encourage everyone to participate and help make this festival the biggest event in the history of Tropical Park.   The deadline to qualify for the early registration prices is November 1st 2014.  Visit our website to register: “
You can contact Under the Sun Art and Music Festival via email at or call 305-666-3355.


The Radically Honest ART Cheerleader
Or, Kelly N Patterson

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Red Disaster (the poem, not the Andy Warhol silkscreen!)

I have to confess:  I never read ART CRITQUES or art journals because personally, I do not want anyONE else’s opinions, interpretations and art prejudices to frame MY experience with a piece of ART (of any media.)  I prefer to experience art (as well as LIFE) a la tabula rasa, or better yet-- as a “blank canvass.”  We SEE art (and the world) as we are…and to demonstrate this fact, I wrote a poem…
Red Disaster (Andy Warhol) 

Red Disaster (Inspired by Andy Warhol)
By Kelly N. Patterson

A brazen, threatening image:
Colossal black and red silkscreen painting
Not one, but twelve icons
Of the progressive, industrialized tool of execution:
Sing Sing’s electric throne
Hanging on the aristocratic walls
Of the Fine Arts Museum
Which inspired Hoffman and Conrad to argue in public.

Conrad commented lightly on the primitive element
Co-existing in modern culture
Death penalty:
Powerful, irreversible commodity
Sani-flush for the degenerate and evil
Antiseptic flush of all human waste.

Hoffman did not appreciate Conrad’s capriciousness
Red is the blood of the prisoner
Black, profound darkness in a lottery-like deeply racial system
He who hath a good lawyer
Hath life.

Thus Hoffman and Conrad continued to argue in public
Until the close of the museum.
Upon parting they vowed to never discuss political issues with one another again.
Hoffman and Conrad never went to the Fine Arts museum again.

Monday, September 1, 2014

Resources for ARTISTS facilitating SOCIAL CHANGE

A Blade of Grass (a non-profit organization) provides valuable RESOURCES to ARTISTS who demonstrate artistic excellence and serve as innovative conduits for SOCIAL CHANGE. To that end, ABOG is inviting Letters of Interest for its Fellowship for Engaged Art!  Happy Birthday to US!!

The ABOG fellowship supports socially engaged projects that promote ART as a CATALYST for social change (NOTE:  I COULD argue that ALL ART is a catalyst for social change, but that is a blog in itself!); projects that feature artists in leadership roles; dialogue-based projects that emphasize active and sustainable partnerships with communities; and projects in which artists engage community members as equal partners on locally relevant issues, or globally relevant issues as they apply to the local context. *Projects in which co-creation with non-artists is part of the process are highly encouraged.
Fellows will participate in a program that features a range of services, including a two-day orientation that explores ABOG's documentation and assessment models and includes workshops on strategies for community engagement; quarterly co-assessment meetings with other fellows to share progress and offer feedback to one another; support and feedback for ongoing self-assessment in the form of collaborative action research; and assessment by an “outside evaluator”.
Eligible applicants include individual artists as well as artists’ collectives with projects that engage directly with a specific community or communities. NOTE: Artists may not currently be enrolled as students and must be legal United States residents or U.S. citizens who are at least 25 years of age. In addition, applicants must have a website with contextualized examples of past work that a selection panel can review.
Letters of Interest must be received no later than November 24, 2014. Upon review, selected applicants will be invited to submit full applications.
For complete program guidelines, information about previous fellows, and application procedures, visit .


The Radically Honest ART Cheerleader
Kelly N Patterson

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Radically NEW Business Model (for ME, at least!)

Business as NOT USUAL, please! 

As you may know, a couple weeks ago, I “formally” accepted the position of “Community Manager” of  At the time, I thought it was a DREAM come true!  I would get PAID to do what I LOVE (which is CONNECT, COMMUNICATE, EDUCATE and EMPOWER people--*especially Lightworkers!) and simultaneously, procure funds for ME that would enable me to create my OWN Lighthouse!

LightHouse:  An INclusive (opposite of Exclusive—because exclusivity just perpetuates DUALITY-THINKING and LIVING!), CONSCIOUS COMMUNITY HOME/WORK/STUDIO/Healing ARTS SANCTUARY and “Living School” for Lightworkers!   *preferably on the beach, please!

However, within 4 DAYS of 8+ hours work a day, I REALIZED I was NOT IN-JOYing my experience as full-time Community Manager (aka, a “REAL JOB”!)  Surprise!

Therefore, I used RADICAL HONESTY and SHARED my TRUE FEELINGS with my new employers (who happen to be Lightworkers as well!):

“All of a sudden MOST of my time is “chained” to the computer.  All of a sudden, I have to pay attention to TIME and DATES and OTHER people’s schedules (which goes against “living in the flow.”) All of a sudden I have to “document” my correspondence (which has been overwhelming!) and this goes against TRUSTING the connections that show up for me, and goes against LIVING in the FLOW.

Every day, a dozen new tasks are added to my “To Do” List—which include activities that are not bringing me joy (such as data entry, scheduling Skype conference calls, “customer service” type correspondence, tech support stuff, etc.) 

So I have to ask myself, “Kelly, is your freedom, time and JOY worth more than $2000 a month?!” 

The answer is HELL YES!  My freedom, time and JOY-factor are more important than MONEY and the “hope” of some kind of stability—because, really…nothing is ever really “secure”-- except for CHANGE—right?!

Yes, of course, I have held this position many times in the past, for different agencies—and NOW, it is CLEAR to me, that this kind of “work” no longer feeds my soul.  I prefer having the FREEDOM to FREELY and INTUITIVELY GUIDE people/groups/businesses, etc. to the RESOURCES they need to accomplish THEIR DREAMS –which, of course, includes the Retreat Network (as well as Healersworldwide, Healer Source,, pretty much everyONE who comes into my life!)  Therefore, I am going to take a HUGE LEAP of FAITH and LET GO of this generous GIFT you have given me and TRUST that ALL my needs will be met without sacrificing my time, freedom and JOY.”

Instead, I proposed the following NEW BUSINESS MODEL for MYSELF:

As I do with my Kelly’s Osho Zen Readings, I ASK for a LOVE-DONATION.  GIVE when you can and how much FEELS right for YOU, out of GRATITUDE for my service.

*NOTE: I never turn anyONE down for lack of funds (because man, I have BEEN THERE—I KNOW!)

And *IMHO, any so-called HEALER that refuses to SERVE because the patient does not have enough funds, is no better than our CURRENT US HEALTH CARE SYSTEM!)  I simply “suggest” to those who cannot SHARE their money with me at this time, to PAY the LOVE FORWARD in some way, when the opportunity arises. What people DO is their story—not mine! 


UNIVERSAL LAW of CIRCULATION: The FLOW of GIVING and RECEIVING:  The law of circulation states that all things in the universe are always flowing in circulation but at an ever expanding rate. What you give to one person, you will receive from a different source. So you don’t have to give with the expectation of receiving back from the same person you give to, but knowing that it will definitely come back to you multiplied from other sources. It works according to the law of cause and effect where the universe always mirrors back to you whatever you do.

Besides, I would much rather have people GIVING me MONEY from their HEART, as a form of their GRATITUDE and APPRECIATION for my SERVICE, than because of some old business/time/economic-formula contract model that no longer serves us by STEALING our TIME, FREEDOM and JOY!  And IF you have been following you HARVARD BUSINESS REVIEW stuff, then you would KNOW that studies CONFIRM that HAPPINESS and APPRECIATION for ALL STAFF in the workplace are DIRECTLY RELATIVE to the QUALITY and QUANTITY of WORK PERFORMANCE!  *But don’t listen to ME, do your own business/economics HOMEWORK!

Conclusion:  The awesome creators of Retreat Network agreed to let me do what I have been doing since its conception:  Which is FREELY, INTUITIVELY CONNECTING and GUIDING human and material REOURCES to the people and groups that “show up” for me; communicating and networking with conscious community; educating (FREELY SHARING USEFUL KNOWLEDGE); and ultimately EMPOWERING SELF and OTHERS without ANY limitations!  And in return, they will give me LOVE-based donations when they FEEL it. 


Goofy Guru